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How To Get Your Ex Back After No Contact

| May 1, 2012 | 0 Comments

No contact rule, after a break up, means that you are to cut all sorts of communication between you and your ex.  No phone calls, text messages, e-mails, and especially friendly dates.  Sometimes the no contact rule would even extend up to the point that you will not get in touch with your ex’s friends and relatives too.

The main reason why the no contact rule is applied after a break up is to avoid a certain level or degree of tension between partners. The tension is often a result of anger and pain over the break up.  At this point, nothing that either of the two of you do, can help the situation.  It can actually aggravate the situation at hand.  It can worsen the situation.  More hurtful words can be said thus increasing the level of anger and pain.  Instead of trying to fix whatever is left of the relationship, both of you will end up with more pain.

Get Your Ex Back After No Contact

Just like how the saying goes, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder,” the no contact rule will be most helpful at this kind of situation.  This would allow you and your partner to calm down and sort things out.  This can help you win your ex back since during this period, while you fix yourself, you also are trying to find a way to reconcile.

After a break up, the most common mistake of anyone is to think that their ex wants them to be there.  Also, there are numerous phone calls made promising to change and apologizing for what happened. This would convey how needy and desperate you are.  The constant pleading to reconcile will be futile.  Both of you are still working out on the hurt and pain and are not ready to enter the relationship again.  The tension between you and your partner is still very high and the state of mind that you are in is still unstable and not sensible.  Constant pleading to take you back will just leave you embarrassed and scarred even more.

No contact after a break up may not be easy to implement. There will be a part of yourself that will constantly nag you to call or text, just to know how your ex is and if your ex has coped with the break up already.  But this urge must be controlled to avoid further pain and embarrassment.

The no contact rule allows you to build your self confidence again. You can spend your time by further improving yourself by productive activities like going to the gym, attending a short course, reading a book.  These activities can help you develop yourself both physically and emotionally.  Also, these activities can make you happier since you would be meeting new people, and expanding your horizons.  These things make you more attractive to anyone especially your ex.  Why? It is because of your oozing self confidence that makes you more marketable to other people.  Everyone wants a little competition once in a while. Thus making you more attractive and appealing to your ex’s eyes.

Aside from building you self confidence during the no contact stage, it also allows you and your partner to miss each other.  During this time of “isolation” you tend to remember all the memories that you have with your ex. You tend to reminisce about the good old times.  Memories flashback, even feelings sometimes return.  This causes you to miss your ex.  You remember how happy you were together and you miss those times.  You miss laughing together, joke around, and even just the periods of silences that you have together is missed. You remember how sweet and loving you two once were.  The longer you are apart from each other, the more you miss what you once had. The distance is now more of a torture than that of a comforting solace.  Now you begin to wonder why your ex has not yet contacted you.  You pray hard that your ex is going through the same dilemma that you are in.  But I can sure a hundred percent that your ex is also thinking of the exact same things. Sooner or later your ex will call you and ask you to meet up and talk. Or better yet, you can break your silence and initiate a conversation.  Eventually, the two of you need to talk to anyway, either for closure or to fix things and reconcile.

 

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Category: How To Get Your Ex Back

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